


Miles Away

by jhunieilarde



Series: Miles Away [1]
Category: The X-Files
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:08:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27615344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jhunieilarde/pseuds/jhunieilarde
Summary: Mulder had asked Scully to leave the X Files after Antartica. Despite her resistance, she granted him his wish and left entirely. After five years, their paths are destined to cross again. What awaits them?
Relationships: Fox Mulder/Dana Scully, John Doggett/Monica Reyes
Series: Miles Away [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2019029
Comments: 3
Kudos: 41





	Miles Away

_We can’t keep doing this…_

It’s the last words he said to her before he left her apartment the day she got home from the hospital. What happened with her second abduction was terrible and horrifying for Mulder to add on to it with his self-blame and guilt. Scully was too stunned to say anything, to do anything. She just let it pass. When she got a hold of herself, Mulder’s already out the door, out of her life. She tried to call him, of course. Following him, running after him was preferrable but her body was too weak to exert much effort. She’s still recovering after all. Mulder did not pick or return any of her calls and messages. When she was well enough, she went to see him at his apartment but he was not there. Mulder was not at the officer either as she was informed by Skinner. He was apparently on leave.

Mulder never goes on leave. He hates being idle, out of work, far from the X Files.

The X Files…yes.

Their lovely and mysterious department has been reopened and they’re finally back. Mulder had begged her to go, for her sake, he said. She couldn’t understand it. When she was being threatened of being transferred to some other boring place, she wanted to go, to quit entirely but Mulder begged her then not to let _them_ win. Afterwards, that bee stung her and it changed everything. It was her turn now to say to him not to let _them_ win but he had run away already. He had left her, pushed her away.

She would be lying if she says it did not hurt because it did, it still does, but somehow, she can understand his point of view. She would feel the same way if the situation was reversed. She would ask him to leave the X Files too so he will be safe. Three weeks had passed and Mulder did not make any attempt to be back or contact her at the very least. It was then she realized she must make a decision and it was not an easy one.

“I want to personally hand in my resignation, sir”, she said to Skinner who is looking at her, completely baffled.

“Agent Scully, what is going on? I thought you and Agent Mulder are fighting to keep the X Files open and now that it is open, you wanted to resign?” he asked.

“We both know, sir, that Agent Mulder is not coming back until I leave. The X Files is his life’s work and I am in the way. It is too important that he continue what he does and fight those who wish to keep the truth for themselves. I think, this is going to be the best contribution I can ever hope to contribute to Agent Mulder’s quest. I was not meant to be his partner in the first place. I was placed in the X Files to debunk his work. It is only fitting that I must go to remove all hindrances to his journey”, she answered without pausing.

Skinner has been aware of Mulder’s position about Scully coming back to the X Files. He had asked him, in fact, to transfer Scully to another division or give her, her post back at Quantico but he refused. It’s Scully’s decision what she wants to do in her career. He did not expect that Mulder will go as far as completely shutting out Scully and pushing her to leave like this. This is not just leaving the X Files. Scully’s resignation is leaving the FBI completely and the career she had established. He is about to lose the best, if not, one of the best agents he ever had.

“Agent Scully, I know what happened in Antartica was horrible and I understand what Agent Mulder must feel and why he’s trying to protect you. If you want to leave the X Files to give way to him, I can arrange for your transfer to any department of your choosing or if you want to go back to teaching, I will make that happen. Don’t go so fast as to quitting the bureau completely. You are throwing five years of your work”, he tried to reason with her but judging by the looks on her face, she already made her decision.

“I have made up my mind, sir. It is final”, she responded.

And so, she found herself packing her things in her apartment she called home for years. She feels immense sadness in leaving it. It’s her first home, her own home. She was the one who chose it, bought every furniture in it with her own money, decorated it and painted it herself. Everything about the place is her but she must let it go. It is the sacrifice she must make, one last sacrifice to show to Mulder how much she cares, that she does not blame him for Antartica. Her leaving is the only way for him to come back. She bid her mother goodbye and promised to call as often as she could and boarded the plane.

Scully has no particular destination. She just needs to get away from where all the action is and when it comes to X Files, the action is literally all over the country so she must leave the country. London just popped up in her brain. It could still be about Mulder, she thought. He used to live there, studied in Oxford even. Perhaps, she thought being there will make her feel closer to him in some sense. She will feel his presence while being miles apart.

Thanks to her impeccable credentials as medical doctor, finding a job was not difficult for her. Her savings allowed her to get a good flat and a nice car. She fought the loneliness and tried to start a new life for herself, for Dana and not for Scully. She immersed herself into the culture, the accent, the fashion…everything that will differ her now than the woman she was before back in Washington. She wanted to feel him and at the same time, forget him, forget how much it hurts. When the pain gets too much, she drinks and smokes it away. For a doctor, she knows those habits are bad but they get her through the night.

Few months into her new life in London, she started going out at night. Scully unlocks the cage of her dark side and allowed her to play. Her beauty never fails in catching strangers in pubs. She always comes home with someone. Who? She will never know. She never asked for their names and even if she did, she wouldn’t remember it in the morning. It worked for some time. It helps her forget at night. It helps her become less of an alcoholic.

Soon, Scully had fallen in love with the lifestyle. It’s less complicated, she thought. She gets what she wants which is to be touched, to be adored, to be seen, even just for a night and in the morning, she wouldn’t have to deal with the complication of relationship. The pain is still there, of course. She still misses him. There were nights when she envisioned it was Mulder touching her, adoring her, seeing her but those were fantasies…never meant to be real. She will always push the pain back into the deepest corner of herself and carried on.

Five years flew by in a flash and Scully…Dana, is a bona fide Londoner. She had built a remarkable reputation in the field of medicine while maintaining a very intriguing aura to the relationship department. It added to her allure, some would say. Dana has become a mystery for all and she rather enjoys it, silently.

Then…

“We got three incoming. Car accident. Five minutes out”,

Dana swiftly and effectively secured her hair in a messy ponytail, put on her gloves and proceeded to the emergency bay. She got the first incoming victim: a woman in her mid-30s. There is a big laceration on her head and could be suffering from severe concussion.

“What’s her name?” she asked the paramedic.

“Monica Reyes”, he answered.

“Ms. Reyes, I’m Dr. Dana Scully. We will take care of you, alright? Just hang in there and stay awake”, she said and they rolled the gurney to the operating room.

She did her best in stopping the bleeding. Luckily for Ms. Reyes, her lungs weren’t punctured by any shards of glass that hit her body. The surgery was a success so to speak. Dana then quickly went outside, removed her bloodied gloves and suit and washed her hands. The surgery took more than an hour to complete but it was worth it because she had kept her patient alive. Now, she must deliver the news to her family. She had asked the nurse where she can find Ms. Reyes’ family and was told her fiancé was waiting at the hallway.

She spotted a tall man in white sleeves stained with blood which she can only guess as Ms. Reyes’. He looked American and he also sustained minor injuries.

“Are you her, doctor?” the man quickly said to her.

“You must be Ms. Reyes’ fiancé. I’m Dr. Dana Scully”,

“John Doggett”, he supplied.

“You can breathe now, Mr. Doggett. Your fiancé is going to be alright. She got deep cut on her head which caused a lot of bleeding but it’s natural for a head wound to bleed a lot. We stitched the other cuts in her body due to broken pieces of glass but no damage to internal organs. She will make it if she’ll be a good patient and make sure to rest”, she informed him.

The man breathed a sigh of relief and then smiled at her.

“Thank you, doctor. I was so worried I was going to lose her. I’m pretty sure her partner will also be relieved of this news”, he muttered.

That raised an eyebrow.

“Partner?” she asked.

Mr. Doggett averted his gaze from her to look behind her and smiled even bigger.

“Good news, Mulder. Monica is going to be fine”, he announced.

Dana stiffened. It’s like the oxygen has been knocked out of her lungs and she’s the one in need of medical attention. She cannot bring herself to say anything or to move. She heard the footsteps approaching and memories flooded her brain, memories she had worked so hard to shove deep in her brain to avoid the pain.

“Oh, I told you Monica is a tough—”

He apparently had the same reaction too. Dana fixed her eyes onto the floor, not wanting to look at him although she had already heard his voice. If she sees him, it will make everything real. He will be there, in her new world, in her new life. How is she supposed to cope with that?

“Everything alright? Did you two know each other or something?” Mr. Doggett asked.

Dana was the first to recover and put on the mask. She cleared her throat and faced Mr. Doggett…not him.

“No, Mr. Doggett. I shall leave you for now. I have to check on other patients but I will keep you posted on Ms. Reyes’ progress”, she said and then immediately walked away.

This cannot be happening right now. She had spent five years moving on or more like suppressing, compartmentalizing. Why now? Why is he even in London? X Files don’t reach London. She recalled Mr. Doggett saying Mulder is Ms. Reyes’ partner so it must be about a case. If that’s true then her world just became smaller. She thought she can escape everything by moving to another country but apparently not.

“Are you alright, Dr. Scully?” Dr. Fritz asked when she got in the desk to turnover Ms. Reyes’ file.

“Yes, why wouldn’t I be?” she answered and then asked back while signing up forms at the desk.

Dr. Fritz stepped closer and took the pen from her.

“You’re frustrated and when you’re frustrated, you don’t make eye contact and you write…furiously”, she sighed, “…so what gives?” he asked with more concern.

“One of the guys with Ms. Reyes…”

“…the Americans involved in the car accident?” she nodded.

“I knew one of them, not the fiancé, from way, way back”, she answered.

Her only friend at the hospital let out a small gasp and pretend expression of shock.

“Did you shag him too?!” he dared ask.

Dana turned to him with offended look and slapped his arm.

“Will you lower your voice down, Harry?! And to answer your question, no. I did not shag him…not even a kiss. We used to work together. That’s all”, she answered.

Harry nodded and chuckled a bit before relaxing.

“So, what’s the problem? Shouldn’t you be in there catching up or something?” he asked in curiosity.

He couldn’t understand his friend’s reaction to seeing an old friend. She shook her head.

“He wouldn’t want to see me”, she whispered before grabbing another pen from her pocket and resumed filling up the forms.

She couldn’t wait to get out of the hospital and get herself a proper drink. God knows she deserved it. After her shift, she immediately went to her car and drove to the nearest pub. The best course of action is to drown everything with whisky. It worked well for five years. Besides, Mulder is not going to be in London forever. His life is still back in Washington and he will leave…again. She must keep herself detached as much as she can. Grin and bear it.

Dana ordered her usual and started the drinking fest while devouring one cigarette after another. The combination has served her well so she relies on them now.

“Tough night, doc?” the bartender asked.

She’s not a regular at the place but she’s been there a few times so she recognized him although she forgot his name.

“You can say that”, she responded.

“Well, in that case, your drinks are on the house for the night. It’s the least we can do to repay a lifesaver in this place”, he said and left with a wink.

Dana smiled to herself. That’s one upside to her day. She gets free drinks and it’s a privilege she intends to abuse. She ordered and drank. Ordered and drank. Ordered and drank, until her head went light and her inhibitions are low enough to trip someone over and in that instant, a handsome stranger had tripped over it

Who could say what happens next? One moment the two of them were flirting with each other inside the pub and then the next, he’s on top of her at the backseat of her car. They were just about to really get into it when she felt his weight left her body and heard him yelled at someone. She frowned and sat up.

“What’s wrong with you?” the stranger yelled.

Dana almost chokes when she saw Mulder still holding the stranger’s collar. He looked extremely angry. She had never seen him that angry before, not ever. It actually sent shiver down her spine. Then, Mulder pulled a gun on the stranger.

“Whoa, easy man…”

“I told you. Hands off. Now go or I’ll blow your brains out”, Mulder threatened and the stranger skedaddled.

Mulder’s expression did not change although he tucked his gun in his holster. Meanwhile, Dana is left shocked inside her car by what just happened.

“What in the world were you thinking? Are you insane?” she exclaimed when she finally got a grip.

His glare is sharp, it almost cut her.

“What is insane is a respectable doctor spreading it at the backseat of her car for someone she didn’t even know”, he snapped.

Dana never bothered with what other people think with the way she lives her life now and the setup she found suitable for her but all it took is one comment for Mulder and it collapsed for her. He ruined it all…again. In her rage, she decided to keep her mouth shut, the way she always does and got out of her car to go to the driver’s seat but his strong hand grabbed her arm and slammed her against her own car. Pinning her, in the process, between the car and his body.

“Are you going to pull a gun on me too, Agent Mulder?” she hissed.

She wanted him to know it hurts. She wanted him to know it has been hell for her to drop everything in America and moved to a foreign country so she could allow him to do what he must do. She granted his wish and it cost her everything and he must know that it hurts and that she’s angry at him. Dana is not sure when she started being angry at Mulder. She never thought of it before as she was busy picking herself up and starting from scratch, but seeing him now, she discovered the anger that has been building up for years in her heart. How dare he march in her world the way he did? How dare he scared off the stranger she picked up for her own pleasure? How dare he judged her now with the way she chose to live her life? She never judged him with how he chose to live his or the things that give him pleasure. She never judged him when he pushed her away to satiate his guilt.

“This is not you, Scully”, he muttered.

Scully…it’s been a long time since she last heard someone called her that. That person is gone, long dead, buried somewhere in Washington.

“Dana”, he almost flinched. “My name is Dana and you have no idea who I am, Agent Mulder”, she spat and pushed him away from her and opened the car door but he was on her again and this time he shoved her inside her car, pushed her to the other seat and sat on the driver’s seat himself. “What are you doing? Get out of my car!” she exclaimed.

“There is no way in hell I’m going to let you drive while under the influence of alcohol. Just tell me where you live”, he said and grabbed the keys from her.

She stared at him in disbelief. Is this really happening now?

“Fine. Drive”, she gave up and he did.

No one has spoken throughout the drive up until they reached Dana’s flat.

\--------------------------------

Though uninvited, Mulder came with her inside her flat. He might have told himself that it was to make sure she will get inside without tripping over to some furniture but he knows it was more than that. Seeing her again after five years has been a shock to him. When he left, he needed the time to get away to clear his head. He knew he had been harsh on Scully. It was not her fault she got abducted for the second time. He knew exactly who to blame but he couldn’t help but turn the blame on himself. It was his quest that dragged Scully’s life into the mud with him. If it was not for his stubbornness, she wouldn’t have gotten so deep into the darkness. The things that had happened to her wouldn’t had happened. He had said things to her face in her apartment after she was released from the hospital. He knew he shouldn’t have said it but he couldn’t stop himself at the time. She was there, in that cocoon of alien liquid and tubes, being converted to be a human incubator. She stopped breathing for a few seconds before he managed to revive her. Almost losing her like that shook him to the core and his only resort was to get her out before it’s too late.

Mulder never told her he’s going on leave. He needed it. He spent time weighing his options but, in the end,, he knew it would always remain Scully’s choice. He couldn’t dictate what she must do next and he must learn to accept whatever her decision might be and so he came back to tell her that if she intended to stay, he would not argue anymore, just vow to protect her from everything that wish her harm. When he came back, he was too late. She was already gone. Skinner had informed him that Scully resigned from the FBI, not transferred, but resigned. She threw away her career as an agent completely and left. Skinner told him that she said it was the only way for him to return and continue working at the X Files: for her to get out of the way. His boss expressed his disappointment. He had succeeded in driving her away and he would never see her again.

He tried going to her apartment where they last saw each other. It was already vacant. Scully had moved. He then tried her mother but she told him that her daughter had left and did not tell her where she would go, just promised to call when she’s settled. Her phone number was disconnected too. For a moment, he thought she’s been abducted again, taken away to be experimented, violated. Six months into his frantic search, Skinner informed him that Scully was seen in London, living her own life as a doctor, away from danger. It brought him peace at the very least. She was fine and striving and that’s what kept him going for five years.

When he agreed to attend the dreadful convention in London, it was not in the hope of running into Scully. In fact, he had forgotten that she was in the city. His mind was elsewhere, in a case left back home. Agent Reyes, her new partner, had been a blessing. They think alike. They’re both believers but they’re partnership is nothing compare to what he and Scully used to have and Monica knows that. She can sense that she has no problem with it. Agent Doggett has been a help too in moving on. He became a good friend whom he can have a good talk over a beer. So when the convention entails being trapped in London with Monica and Doggett, it did not bothered him at all. He thought of it as vacation of some sort.

Then, the accident happened. He was on another car while Monica and John caught a ride with another officer. Mulder was supposed to drive them but he forgot his wallet at the table so he must go back. Monica and Doggett hopped on the fellow agent’s car in the hope of not missing their reservation at the restaurant. He did not think that the car would crash. He did not expect he would see Scully again, let alone to be the doctor who saved Monica’s life.

Mulder was simply speechless. When Doggett asked if they knew each other, she had said no without looking at him and it hurt. She was never cold and he felt frozen. Doggett asked him about her, of course, and he told him everything. It was him who encouraged him to follow Scully, to try and talk to her. Perhaps explained that he did not go on that leave as an ultimatum for her to leave the X Files. He wanted to tell her what he realized in his time of absence and how much he wanted her to stay when he found out that she left.

He searched for her until one nurse told him her shift had ended and he might be able to find her in her favorite pub. The word pub and Scully in the same sentence didn’t sound right from the get-go but he went there all the same. His eyes couldn’t believe what they have seen when he arrived. She was there by the bar, drinking and smoking and flirting with a man. Well, he didn’t know she got a boyfriend but soon, he figured out the man was not her boyfriend. He’s a profiler and he could tell the way they interacted with each other. There’s no love or care. There’s only lust.

His suspicion was confirmed when he saw them at the backseat of her car and he couldn’t stop himself. He dragged the man by his collar away from her and pointed his gun at him. It was pathetic and obviously, against the law but he was touching her when she’s drunk, not herself. Her reaction caught him off-guard. She actually wanted it as it turned out and he ruined her night.

Now, standing inside her flat, he felt like an outsider. No one calls her Scully now. She’s Dana. Maybe she was right. Maybe he doesn’t know her anymore. His eyes found her in the kitchen opening a bottle of wine.

“If you’re going to stay even if you’re not invited to stay, might as well have a drink. It’s odd to drink with someone watching you”, she muttered and handed her a glass of wine.

He followed her into her living room but chose to sit across from her so he can see her. She caught him staring and she scoffed.

“Stop profiling me, Mulder. So far, I haven’t killed anyone but myself so you can breathe”, she snapped.

He can see that. The way she acts, she talks. Her accent is a mixture of American and British lilt. The way she decorated her flat and the way she presented herself are completely different. She had emerged herself in a new world and her old self is fading away.

“I’m glad that you’re doing well, Scu— Dana”, he corrected himself.

She started laughing at that.

“Yeah…sure. I’m just fine, Mulder”, it’s been incredibly long since he last heard her say that but it still means the same. She’s not fine.

She devoured alcohol like it’s water and she smokes more than she used to before.

“When I asked you to step back from the X Files, I did not mean for you to leave the country”, he started.

They have to have this conversation. It was five years overdue. He needs her to know he did not intend her to be someone else. He just wanted her to be safe.

“Do you remember when they wanted me to transfer to Salt Lake City?” he nodded, “I drafted my resignation then. If it’s not X Files, I couldn’t see myself working at the bureau anymore. Besides, that would have been torture…to continue working in the same building or same institution as you and…” she scoffed and lit up her cigarette. “It’s all in the past now, Mulder. There’s no use going back now”, she said.

He saw her pained expression as she tried to dampen it all with her bad habits but they barely work. He wanted to reach out to her and comfort her the way he used to do but he’s not sure whether she will accept it or not.

“I was supposed to tell you after I got back from my leave that whatever you would choose or decide, I will support you. If you have chosen to remain in the X Files, I will not oppose you or force you to leave”, he revealed.

She stared at him for a moment before she shrugged.

“Well, it all worked it out in your favor anyway. I got out of the way and you got to resume working in the X Files. All is well, Mulder. Don’t worry about it”, she responded.

Dana got up to refill her glass but she lost her balance and stumbled. If it was not for Mulder, she would’ve landed on her face.

“I’m fine”,

“Stop it!” he snapped.

Mulder grabbed the glass from her hand and put out the cigarette on her other hand. She reeks of alcohol and she felt so light in his arms. He had carried her before so he knows. She’s not taking good care of herself. Despite her accomplishment as medical doctor, she failed in rebuilding her personal life. As her career took off, her personal life falls apart.

“What are you doing here, Mulder? I did what you wanted. I left for you. I stayed away and you’re the one who stumbled in my hospital. Just go and go back to your world and leave me be”, she asked.

There are so many things he wanted to say to her but nothing wants to come out of his mouth. His heart couldn’t express them in words so he did the only thing he can make her feel what he wants to say to her, the answer to her question. Mulder cupped her face and pressed his lips to hers which completely took her by surprise. They never kissed before. They almost did if it was not for that bee. He can feel her hesitating so he deepened the kiss until she yielded and responded.

It's everything he thought it would feel. She tastes heaven and yet there’s a hint of sorrow. The bitterness of whisky represented her pain, the pain he put her through by asking her to go. She told him herself. She did it for him. It was an act of sacrifice for his benefit. She sanctioned herself to five years of pain and sadness for him. He thought he did her a favor by sparing her from danger of his world but he only hurt her in the end. He wanted to erase all of that.

“I’m sorry, Scully”, he whispered in between kiss and she whimpered.

She pulled him closer. He can feel his member poking at her stomach. Her hands are eager and so are his.

“Bedroom. Now”, she demanded.

The urgency and authority of her voice urged him to do so and he picked her up without breaking the kiss and with her direction, took her to her bedroom and tossed her onto her bed. She pulled her blouse over her head revealing her black bra underneath. She looked heavenly, a goddess on earth. It is too much for his eyes. He felt like he was just imagining it and then he recalled why he was there in the first place. He was there to talk, to explain. He’s not supposed to be there and fuck a very drunk Scully who is hurting because of him. It’s wrong.

“I can’t do this”, he blurted out and pulled away from her.

Dana pushed herself up and frowned.

“Oh my god—”

She shook her head and got out of bed and went to her bathroom and closed the door.

“Scully, I’m sorry. Please hear me out”, she did not open the door.

He can hear the water running inside and her breathing. It seems like she’s shaking, trembling.

“It’s not that I don’t want you. I do. I really do, so much in fact. I just don’t want to take advantage of you. That’s all. I came here to talk and you’re drunk. It felt wrong”, he explained to her wooden door.

Five minutes later, she opened the door. Her makeup was gone and her hair was wet a little.

“It’s fine, Mulder”, she said and walked past him in her bra.

He watched her stripped and grabbed an oversized shirt from her drawer and put it on. She then picked up her clothes and folded them neatly.

“Can we talk, please?” he pleaded when he realized she’s not going to acknowledge his presence at all.

“I doubt there’s more to talk about, Mulder, and you have a partner to go to at the hospital. She’ll be out soon and you’ll be back in Washington in no time so why bother? Just go. I am tired and I have work tomorrow. I want to rest”, she answered coldly.

She did not look at him. Her long red hair is blocking his eyes from seeing her face.

“Of course, you had a long day at work. I will not keep you up. I will see you tomorrow at the hospital”, he heard her sigh, “Goodnight, Scully”, he said and left her flat.

Five years…he wasted five years to get her back. He’s not going to waste some more. He found her or rather they have found each other. It was fate who did the work for them. It’s his turn to take action. This time, he’s not going to push her away again. This time, he’s going to get her back.

**Author's Note:**

> so this is going to be a series of fics...watch out for more continuation on this one.


End file.
